loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Another nite.. I jus cant get to sleep.. Feeling very vexed.. So i got up.. Sat at my window and stared at the moon again.. Its becoming my fave thingy to do alone at nite these days.. I still have to work tml so i still have to go back to bed after blogging. Argh.. I'm tired but jus cant slp. I'm thinking about too many things. Too many things that i know i should not be thinking about. This is bad. I need my beauty sleep.. *yawnz*


loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Jus got home from the gym.. Spent an hour there on the treadmill.. It feels so good to sweat it all out. I love the way i feel now.. Alive.. The gym was renovated, so now people from the pool can look inside and people inside can look outside. The treadmills are facing the swimming pool so its very nice. You can see kids running around, fat ugly uncles and aunites in their tight tight swimsuits.. I think it sort of serves as a form of motivation for me... I don't wanna end up fat and ugly! I'm going to train harder now.. Get back in shape so i can wear those pretty skirts that i saw in the mag the other day. I know i have fat legs. *pouts* But nevertheless, i'll make it a point to go down the gym every other day!!

I also wanna join the Mtv dance class.. But too bad i have no money.. *double pouts* It's digusting when you have not enough to do want you wan. Horrible.. Pls Pls Pls let me find a sugar daddy who is 75 years old, sick and dying, no children and owns at least a diamond mine! *winkz* He's my dream bf.... hahahahah..

Those who fit the criteria above, pls send your personal particulars to dreambf@hotmail.com, along with a recent photo of yourself. Thank you.

Going to shower now.. Tired.. Hungry... Wonder whats for dinner?! Hmmm..

*tIng gets up and walks away.*

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Was staring at the moon from my window. The night is so cooling.. i could feel the wind blowing against my face. I looked at the moon for a very long time, asking myself what was wrong. I cant answer myself. At last, i prayed to the moon silently, telling her that the only thing i wish for was to stop people from lying to me. That's my only wish now.

After that, i looked down. The lights from the downstairs looked so enticing. Its like drawing you to move closer. I can understand how people must have felt when they wanted to jump down. I'm jus saying that its beautiful. I'm not that upset to the extent of hurting myself in any way. He's not worth the effort.

Sometimes, i'm really confused. The line between truth and lies is so blurred. I cant really tell who's telling lies or the truth anymore. I cant trust anyone.. not even myself.. my own feeling.. I really jus want to forget about all of this. I hope it'll make me feel better.

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Jus when i thought things cant go any more wrong, my stupid lappy had to hang on me.. not once.. but TWICE. Argh.. Furthermore, SCV is showing the most absurd version of Jin Yong's Demi-Gods and Semi-Devils (Tian Long Ba Bu) ! I hate it when they twist the story around and make it soo diff from the original book. Its so ridiculous. Why don't they jus write a new story?! ARGH.. Absolutely disgusted.. Pissed off.. Turned off...

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

I'm home.. Quite surpised that i actually made it home. Cant explain how i felt jus now but all i know is that i was walking aroung Jurong West Ave 75, 2 and i forgot where. I cant remember how many juctions i crossed or where i was walking to cause i was simply crying too hard. It was to a point where i jus sat at the bus stop and cried my heart out.


He may not know why i was so upset. He may never understand. I've been through it. I've learnt things the hard way. How hard it is to find someone to love and to hold and treasure all your life.. It jus hurts me to know that he lied to me straight in the face. I jus cant take that. I jus dun wish to see another gal going through the same pain that i've been through. I was messed up. No one should be treated the same way. No one deserve to be.

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

I cant find my HP!!!! Argh... I jus got home after meeting Kong at my workplace to pass him some comp passes. After we had supper, i took bus 14 home.. when i reached Tanah Merah, I realised that i cant find my HP! Oh god damm it.... I hope i din drop it anywhere.. I hope its in Kong's car.... And the worst thing is that he's not answering my calls... Dunno where the hell is he... Ask me to msg him when i get home but what the heck?!! I dun even think he bothers if i'm home or not... Men..

Gosh.. I dun wanna spend money on a new hp... (even though i really wan the one Seng has..white colour one).. FUCK FUCK FUCK larz... Hope and pray its on his car!!! PLS!!!

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Absolutely pissed of with myself.. I'm so useless!!! I was already on my bed.. but i jus cant get to slp.. WHY? Cause i'm hungry!!! Argh... Cant resist the temptation of food! Stupid me... Now i'm awake and eating AGAIN.. I must curb these hungar pangs... ARGH...

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Jus finish cutting my nails.. Removed the black nail polish and applied a new coat of clear vanish. My nails are quite weak... so upset since i have to cut them.

Feeling peckish now.. How i wish i could have a plate of Horfun... YUMMY.. but i guess i shouldn't eat so much now.. I jus had Mac for dinner.. This is no good.. I can almost feel at the fats accumulating around my thighs and arms.. YUCKS!!

Have to work tml and sun.. Eddy's going to his gay spa on Sunday so i'll take over his shift. Heehee.. He seems so happy when he was telling me that.. Its been so long since he last had a proper off day. Poor guy...

Anyway, i'll going off now.. Going to watch tv and continue "nuaning"...

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

I like to think of my life in terms of songs..Here's how it goes..

When i fell in love with him, but he's not totally sure how he feels about me:
- What can I do (The Corrs)

When we watched movie together for the first time:
- Too lost in you (Sugarbabes)

When I found out he held her hands:
- Don't say you love me (The Corrs)

When we finally were together:
- Pieces of Me (Ashlee Simpsons)

When i knew all the lies he told me:
- Kissing a Fool (Micheal Buble)

When i found out he fell in love with her:
- Never Ever (All Saints)
- Undiscovered (Ashlee Simpson)

When we were unhappy:
- Sexed up (Robbie Williams)

When i left him:
- My Happy Ending (Avril Lavigne)
- The Ghost of you and me (BBmak)

Its hard for to me to put in all the lyrics at one go.. but i guess they all showed how i felt at those times in my life. Somehow this soundtrack of my love story has to come to an end. People tell me how he's not worth crying over and how he never really loved me. They tell me i should forget him and there are many other better people out there. Its always easy to say it. I've told many frens the same thing. I'll try.

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

I forgot to mention that Stan is the GREATEST MAN ON EARTH!! He's so nice.. He not only lent me his lap to cry on.. he also helped me to the toilet when i was puking... Stan Teo! You are now ranked as my new BEST GUY FREN!!

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

I'm back home!!! Still high from all the partying tonight at Chinablack with Stan teo and his frens! Its been so long since i party soo HARD!! I've never been soo stoned! First, i was like drinking jim bean with coke and the next thing i knew, i was running into the guys' toilet to puke! I think i really made a fool of myself... Heeheee..

Den after puking, i was crying on Stan's lap... I oso dunno what i was upset about.. I jus felt like crying.. And tears jus came flowing down.. I'm so fucking silly.. Maybe i shouldn't have drank so much..

Well, after puking TWICE and crying, i danced and danced the night away! So HIGH!! It was to a point where i fell of the blardy stage! hahahha.. Somemore i was dancing with Stan's fren.. and the both of us fell onto the dance floor!! He was supposed to hold on to me if i fell but i jus pulled him down with me! Poor guy.. i nearly puked on him... Haha.. But in the end he himself puked twice as well!!! So much for being a good fren! Share the puking somemore!!


loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Absolutely disgusted with the amount of time i have nowadays.. I'm so BORED!!! There's nothing to do execpt to sit in front of the tv and be a couch potato! I wan to go back to work! There's no one online now... Nobody to talk too.. Everyone's so busy.

*tIng checks her handphone.*

No calls.. No msg.. ARGH! I'm soo bored that i'm dying..

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Finally decided to come back and start blogging again.. Maybe its because i cant find a better way to talk about my feelings, thoughts and views about stuff. Let me jus briefly update the things that happened the past few days while i was away.

Friday, 19 Nov
Stayed at home all day playing game. Am obsessed with the game Maple Story... Played till 11 plus plus den went to meet kong for supper. Actually, we din eat at all but instead went to the beach to talk about stuff. I'm surprised that he actually came down to meet me. When we started talking den i realised that its because Jessica (Seng's gf) is back from Australia and was at the hostel that day. So thats why he came down to meet me. Hmm...

I have to be very proud of myself. I was not stupid enough to let anything happen again. Actually, my sis was very pissed off with me when i told her that i'm meeting him. Cause she read my blog and she felt that i shouldn't even bother about people who calls me bitch, let alone even consider them as frens. But i guess i'm not that bothered about him calling me bitch. I'm am who he thinks i am. Won't try to change his opinion of me.. its not impt.

Saturday, 20 Nov
Woke up around 11 plus, watched TV for awhile and den got dressed to go down to my workplace to pass the keys to Eddy. After that, i went to Tanjong Pagar to meet my cousin, hiang, to help him make some phone calls

Went to Eastpoint with Hiang and Zhiping.aka.Hei ren. Heiren is actually hiang's long time buddy, he basically watched me grow up. He's a very nice guy... but he's recovering from his divorce. Poor guy.. They acc me to NTUC to buy stuff for steamboat at my house.

Hiang was sick that day so he went off early. Me and heiren ate steamboat alone at my house for about an hour before mum came back. After having steamboat, me, my mum and him went for a movie at GV TM. We watched "The Incredibles". Its such a funny show. Really like the baby..
Was telling my mum that this was me and heiren's first "date" and my mum tagged along. Haha.. Silly.. Somemore she sat in the middle... Simply ridiculous. Nah.. He's jus a big brother to me.

Sunday, 21 Nov
Woke up around 3 plus.. watched TV.. Went to meet heiren for dinner at Eastpoint. After eating, i took a bus home and continued to slp til 11 plus... I'm sooo bored.

Going off to play game now..
loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

I think i need to be alone for a while right now. Going to focus on the more important things in my life. Letting go is never easy. Jus hope i can find the courage to carry on.

*tIng takes a deep breathe.*

At this point of time, i can only tell myself it was all a dream. I have to wake up now. I'll stop reading her blog everyday. I'll stop reading his blog everyday.

This blog will no longer be in use anymore.

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

This is going to be a very short entry cause i'm feeling quite horrible now. The side effects of the respiratory medicine is really very strong even in a very small dosage. Am shaking really badly now and my heart is pumping like mad. My breathing is much better though. At least now i can breathe without hyperventilating.

Went to the clinic ar 201 jus now. The doc said my lungs and throat are swollen and my nose is infected. I told him i cant take the pills for lungs cause i suffer very bad side effects. So he prescribed me the syrup form which is mixed into the cough syrup. Unfortunately, it's not helping.

Am crying now.. Not sure why..I'm not a lier

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

I'm coughing badly again... This always happens when the mucus from my nose flows backwards and into my lungs.. after that, it jus accumulates and breathing starts to become hard. Last year, my doc suggested an op to remove all the stuff inside but i couldn't afford the time cause i was too busy studying. working and organising school events.Not to mention, trying to maintain a relationship. Plus, i had no money. So right now the left side of my lung is smaller as compared to the right. This explains why i cant exercise like running and stuff.

Will fix myself when i have the time and the money to do so. It's getting harder and harder to breathe.

*tIng takes a tissue and blows into it.*

The pooh bear accessory on my hp broke jus now. This cant be a good sign. Maybe it means something bad's going to happen soon. I hope nothing will go wrong. Sometimes, when you think everything is going well, some bad will jus happen suddenly. Haiz.

Will have to wake up early tml cause i'll be going breakfast with my parents, sis and her jap fren.

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

saddness 

Broke up with Kiat. Told him to leave me and find someone else who will love him more than i did. I was causing him to much pain and agony. I was taking advantage and taking too much from a relationship. I was selfish and possesive. I was hurting him too much.

He should be loved. Find another gal who will look in his eyes and smile. Find a gal who will not break him into pieces. My love for him has turned morbid. There's no turning back.

I'm not the same gal that you loved anymore.

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

I dunno how should i start this but i'll jus let my thoughts flow..

Ever since i started dating, there's one thing i've always be very sure about. I will not tolerant infidelity. But i have never thought that i would be be in this situation. The saddest thing to say is that the man that i really loved for a very long time had cheated on me. When i found out about it, i was heartbroken. At some point, i wished that he had just fucked her only. Why? Infidelity of the mind is worse than infidelity of the physical body. If he had told me it was just pure sexual urges, i would accept it. This is because having sex does not necessary involves feelings. You don't have to love that person in order to sleep with her.

But infidelity of the mind is another matter altogether. It means that you felt something for that person and wished to be together with her. It means that i was not the only one inside your heart. You loved her.

Everyone has the right to find their true love. Some people spent their whole lives looking for it. I thought i found my true love.

I forgave you once but you went back to look for her. Even though you insisted that it was nothing, i was still hurt. But i still forgave you, cause i knew i loved you. However, after getting back together, i've realised that i cant loved you the same way as i did before.

No longer can i trust you enough to give you the freedom that you need. No longer can i look at you without thinking whether you are lying to me. I don't want to be dependant on you anymore. I was forced to "grow up" all of a sudden.

Being with you in the past made me felt safe. I could always look for you when i was down, sick or just feeling upset. You always knew what to say and how to make me feel better. But its all wrong. I was relying on you too much that when i knew you had someone else, i fell apart.

Now, its all different. I don't want you to look after me all the time. I don't want you to be the only one i talk to about my problems. It's too risky to be emotionally dependant on one person. I need more people. People like frens.. People like Su ken, Huilin, Sally and Yanwen. I cant depend on you anymore.

I know i'm very difficult to handle nowadays. You feel that i'm screaming, yelling and venting my anger at you all the time. Yes, i know. But when i'm yelling at you, at least i'm talking to you. Would you rather i kept quiet and not answer you when you ask me what's wrong? I yell when i'm angry. That's the way i communicate. I know you don't like it when we fight. That's why your heart strayed.

Till this day, weeks had passed since it happened. I know i still cannot accept it. Its really not easy to overcome. Especially harder because of my insecurity had been enlarged a hundred times more than before. It's to a point to which it is deplorable.

I don't make a very good gf.

*tIng sighs and walks away.*

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Every thing about me is WRONG. Everything i say or do is wrong. I'm not trying to vent my anger on you like you say. I was trying not to say anything already but when you keep asking me what what what, the sound of my voice like makes everything worse. Everything is wrong with me. What the hell.

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Jus came back town.. Went to this beer place opp suntec (i forgot what's the name of the place) with Sally, Yanwen, Chaiyang, Richard, Iskandar and Zen. Its been such a long time since i last saw people from SP Clubs... Had quite some fun teasing the waiter there. Haha..

Iskandar.aka.Christina and Zen.aka.UGLYLIRA were happily teasing this guy called Kai, who waited on us. Actually, they kept telling Kai that they wanted to have a threesome with him.What happened to my NORMAL GUY FRENS? Why are all my guy frens acting like gays?

*tIng faints.*

Anyway, it was fun hanging out with frens again. I din want to spend all night sulking at home jus because Kiat was out at Chinablack or Zouk. He's upset cause i'm out with frens and i din reply his msgs. But isn't it the same when he's out with his frens and too busy to reply my msgs. But please, i don't say things like "Since you are enjoying so much and dun need to care. So be it." What the hell does this means? Its been like how long since i was with my club frens. At least a year since i last saw them. I don't go out with my frens all that often. Not even with su ken or huilin. Thanks for asking me to enjoy.

Yes, its true that i'm uncomfortable when he goes clubbing. And this is because i felt that clubbing 3 times a week is simply too much. When i told him how i felt, he jus disagreed with me and said that he only felt that 4 times or more a week was excessive. Ok.. I accept that. That's why i found somethings to do to distract me. So i wun sulk at home. I dun like to feel upset all the time as well.

Its also true i'm upset when he doesn't inform me where is he going. Like he went out at 4 plus am in the morning with his frens without telling me, and the time he went supper with Pat and the rest without telling me, not to mention yesterday he went to meet his fren on his bike to i dunno where. And all these i found out only when i called or msged him. I'm don't even know what time he reached home yesterday. Yes its true that i was sick yesterday... but i don't think reading a msg would take up alot of my strength and energy.

Don't tell me you will be home early... Yes you are always home early.. at 5 or 6 am in the morning. That i know. I rather hear from you that you will be home late tonight. It makes alot of difference. At least i wun wait up for you to msg me, thinking for ONCE YOU MIGHT BE HOME EARLY.

What am i? I'm not the same naive gal anymore. I wun always be there, esp not, after knowing that what you are capable of. Please dun take for granted that i'll always be there.

Am watching the show on TV, The legend of White Snake. I hate the character Xu xian. He's such a bastard. Not worthy of love. Today, Sally told me that Yanwen's bf also sort of cheated on her while she's away in US but Yanwen is still with him. When confronted, the gal simply said that its her bf who came looking for her on his own accord. What a bitch! Why do all the 3rd parties act as though they are simply innocent? Fucking hell.. Is there actually a school for 3rd parties, teaching them to say the same thing? Men are idiots but gals are jus as idiotic as well. Why do we keep forgiving those guys who cheat on us?

I think the only reason is that you simply don't stop loving that person even after they hurt you. You jus have to choose either to forgive them or choose to love them in another way. Both yanwen and me chose the first way. Forgive. Its the hard road.

Sally asked me why did i even bother to forgive Kiat after hearing all the things he did. I've asked myself the same question a million times over and over again. My conclusion is that i cant simply stop for feeling for someone that i loved so deeply.

*tIng cuts open her chest and checks.*

I'm not that heartless.

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Was supposed to go swimming but it started to rain.. blardy hell.. heaven must be playing tricks on me... Never mind.. Shall start preparing to go out now..

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Am watching meteor gardens 1 now.. I've always loved the story of Shancai and Daoming si. How real and deep their love is for each other.. Haiz.. So touching..

Seems like a fine day.. debating whether i should go swimming now.. Its been such a long time.. I hope its not crowded at the pool.. I hate kids. Don't get me wrong. I like children but not those noisy irritating kids who run amok like no one's business and esp not those who calls me "auntie". Everytime i hear that, i really feel like strangling the kid and tell him to open his eyes! Which part of me looks like an auntie! %$##@$%

Anyway.. i think i'm going to swim after watching meteor gardens. The weather's too good to waste. My nose's still blocked though, but i'm sure it'll clear up.

Going to meet Sally later at City Hall.. Its been a long time seen i last met up with her. No plans to meet up with Kiat cause i know he's going clubbing later.

I dun enjoy clubbing. The number of times i've been to Zouk can be counted with one hand. Given a choice i would rather go to a lounge or something to talk to frens. No doubt i do enjoy the music at Zouk, but i dun really see the need to dance. I enjoy looking at other people dancing cause i think they are doing a better job than me. Sitting and watching people dance is my way of enjoying as well. Anyway, i'm not desperate for men either. I dun see the point of going there to seduce men. I dun mind going clubbing if i'm looking for a fling or something. But right now, i'm not interested.

I think some guys are really mean towards gals. Kissing, touching and bedding a gal but after all that you tell us you jus wanna be frens. Gals are not toys to be played around with. Emotional Fuckwittage. Bastards.

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Still feeling quite awful today.. nose is blocked, occasionally runny.. head is in throbbing pain... feverish as well

Overall.. i'm very off colour.. Have not seen a doctor yet cause its raining outside. Told kiat not to come over cause i din wan him to be caught in the rain. He din seem to mind not coming.. Not too concerned..

Mum jus called to tell me that she wun be home early. Guess this means that she wun be home for dinner..

Will go to the doc once the rain stop.. Hopefully i can find the strenght to walk there.

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Other than being not caring enough, I think I'm really insecure. I don't really know why I tend to think in a very pessimistic way. When my bf (ex or present) do not answer my calls or my msgs, i would immediately think that they are outside with another gal or something. Its as though it is all programmed in my brain or something.

This is even worse after what had happened with kiat. Actually, the reason why i was very reluctant to start a relationship with him in the first place was because i had a feeling that he would cheat on me. I had a very strong feeling and this i told 2 person, Kathy and Seng. Both of them were trying very hard to convince me that i was thinking to much. Yes, i admited i was thinking too much so I accepted him.

Ever since i found out about her, i'm totally broken. I think its because in the past, i was too dependant on him emotionally. Whenever i has problems or anything, i can always look for him. It was hard for me to accept that he had feelings for someone else. It was hard for me to realise that the person i talked to everyday was lying to me. The sense of betrayal was too much for me to bear.

I've realised that you cant depend too much on other people. Not emotionally, not finacially..

Nowadays, when he doesn't answer my calls or my msgs, i would fear that he's with someone else. Even though i know he's trying very hard to make thing up to me, i still cant help feeling this way. I know he's fustrated when i'm feeling down. I have to get over it, i really am trying. I know this isn't healthy and i should stop imagining things. I should try to control my feelings.

Should i accept the fact that he's got many close frens, frens who calls him intimately? I'm always feeling down these days, esp when he goes clubbing. I know he enjoys dancing and i shouldn't stop him. But i just feel uncomfortable, not knowing who he's going to meet there. I used to let him do whatever he likes with much confidence cause i knew that he wouldn't lie to me. After what happened, that level of trust jus isn't there anymore.

He said he's willing to give up clubbing for me but i think he's missing the whole point. What's the point of stopping him from doing things that he enjoys? It wouldn't make me feel any better.

*tIng sighs.*

How can i feel better? How can i look at him and feel the same way as i did in the past? Is it true that time heals all wounds? I hope time will tell....

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

I used to think that i'm not a good gf. I'm never caring enough and neither am i romantic enough. This was until yesterday when my sis told me and my mum what she did to her bf, Amir. Basically, i think that she was trying to murder him.

Amir was sick the last two days and my sister, the "caring" gf, offered to cook him porridge. Since he was sick, she decided to he needs more fibre in order to get well. Sis, if you are reading this, i'm really sorry i have to say this. Vegs do not go into porridge in stalks.

Well, i've known my sister for 20 years and i have NEVER seen her cooked anything else other than maggie mee. If i said i'm surprised to see her cook, it would be an understatement.

*tIng shakes her head in disbelief of her sis's cooking.*

Another thing my sister ALMOST did was to cook pork porridge for Amir. He's a Muslim for goodness's sake! However, luckily for Amir, my sister actually discovered her mistake before harm was done.

*tIng heaves a sign of relief for Amir.*

Did i forget to mention she also gave him the wrong dosage of medicine? I think i'm quite lucky today since she's not home. At least i'm quite safe from her cooking and the medicine. Better go count my lucky stars now..

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

I'm not feeling well.... nose is runny.. fever.. tired..

*tIng takes a tissue and blows her nose*

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Its been such a LOOONG day! Oh my god, i'm poofed! Exhasted to the MAX! Let me start from the beginning...

8.20am
Woke up feeling v. nervous! Going to meet the BIG shots from Robinsons Group with Phyllis, my manager. Jumped out of bed, took a quick shower, and got dressed. I spent the whole night trying out pants. Finally decided on black stripped pants from Mango (courtesy of my sis) and a black top. I dun wanna look too formal either.

8.55am
Rushed out of the house. Luckily, i din fall or trip! I'm so not used to wearing heels.

9.38am
Reached the entrance of Phoenix hotel, waiting for Phyllis.

9.40am
Reached the office of Robinsons Group. I'm so nervous that my hands were shaking! I hope i dun embarrass myself.. Be cool, be professional! I hope they are nice!

The GM of marketing was Lena Phua.. She's in her 60s yet she looked so young! She doesn't even look 50! Gosh! She's so nice! She's very experienced.. I think she's really impressed by Inizio's products and packaging. The whole slink and clean image is very appealing i would say..

11.40am
Phew! Finally finished the presentation to them! Its very positive! Looks like they are considering to give us some shelve space at Raffles.. Its not much.. not impressive or anything but its a good start. I believe it would work out better cause there will be more crowd which DEFINATELY means more SALES.

2pm
Have been wrapping Christmas gift packs all afternoon.. Its pretty nice! Used green and red wrappers of different textures and some small Christmas decorations.. The overall look is definately very up-market and different from the other cosmetics brands.

8.30pm
Eddy popped by after closing and waited for me to finish closing. He's thinking about whether to look for "bananas" tonight.

8.55pm
Off work liaoz!! Going to take bus home.

10.pm
Reached Tamp 201.. Walked over to Mac to buy my DINNER.. i'm STARVING! I've only eaten a sandwich from TCC.. so sad... so unsatisfying.. My body needs SUGAR.. FATS.. GIVE IT TO ME...

10.05pm
Walking home from 201 is a stupid choice! My heels are killing me! I can barely walk straight, carrying my laptop, my bag and my DINNER. I hate heels! Have heels will NOT TRAVEL!

10.20pm
Reached home FINALLY! Dumped my bag, plopped down on the sofa, ready to eat my dinner!!

10.22pm
ARGH.. FUCK FUCK FUCK! FUCKING HELL! Spilled my ice tea! Damm.. have to wipe the blardy table! Thanks to durffy who is cleaning up the mess on the floor!

10.30pm
Sitting down, finally............ FOOD! FOOD AND TV... This is LIFE. I'm happy now! Going to watch tv till i'm sleepy..

1204am
Durffy's going mad i think.. He's very emotional right now.. I'm yawning and sneezing at the same time.. Quite difficult to do both at the same time! Almost impossible.. Hmm..
loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Had a very strange dream yesterday..

In the dream, i was on a cab, on my way to Marina square. However, the cab driver was driving me to Marina Bay instead. When i realised it, i told him to turn the way around. Instead of driving me to Marina Square, the cab drove right into the edge of the river and into the waters.

The cab was sinking slowing and water was seeping in from all around. I was so afraid. I quickly pushed the car door open and started to swim towards the water surface. The cab driver was also swimming towards the surface. I begged him to help me to the shore but he din even look at me. He kept swimming away.. Luckily for me, there were police coast guards around...

They helped me ashore but by that time, a crowd has gathered around.. There was also a TV crew! *tIng winks*

Unfortunately, my first TV appearance wasn't as glam as i hope it was supposed to be. =P

Anway, these are all that i can remember.

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Was very appalled by my manager, Eddy, today by his vivid description of his sexual enounter with his lover. Gosh.. i never really wanted to know how his lover gave him a blowjob in the cinema and how they had sex...

*tIng faints and drops onto the floor, foaming at the mouth.*

But anyway.. he's really a nice guy.. always very good to me.. buy me snacks... =P

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Jus came back from a walk with durffy.. He's so shagged out.. We walked from Simei Mrt to Tampines and back to Simei. Poor durffy was panting like an old man...

Throughout the journey, durffy managed to:

-kicked a snail
-get discriminated by Starbucks staff at TM
-rode on a NTUC trolley
-ate BK's fries and onion rings
-drank from Kiat's nalgene
-peed on Kiat's bag

Overall, he had an adventurous day... I guess its like a Hobbite travelling to Mount Doom and back. =)

*tIng pats Durffy on his head."

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

dUrffY @ BK Simei  

a rAbBit 

dUrffY oN a NTUC tRolleY 

Sudden thought..

I'm just one tiny weeny part of this population. I hate being ordinary. I could be ugly, stupid or fat. Anything BUT ordinary.

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

Am at home watching tv today.. Called Gv and told them i'm sick (this is not a lie wor.. i was feeling feverish yesterday).

I dunno if you know the taiwan drama called "No.8 Pawnshop". It's about the devil who allows mortals to pawn anything in exchange for their wishes to be granted. For example, you can pawn your soul in exchange for immortality or pawn your lifespan for unlimited money. What will I pawn and what will i wish for?

I would give my soul in exchange for the pure, untainted love.

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.

I hate wearing shoes when its raining. I hate it when the rain water goes into my shoes, making my socks wet. I hate it when i have to walk around in wet shoes. =(

My feet felt very upset today cause they were wet, cold and wrinkly... The sole of my feet were white from wearing wet socks. The socks were squishy and every step i make, i can feel the water being squeezed out. Dun you hate this feeling too? I had to walk around Bugis in wet jeans and shoes... Seriously, i felt sorry for my feet today. They are still feel upset as i'm typing this.

*tIng pouts, stretching her lips across the room.*

loVe iS a deLuSiOn tHat OnE mAn dIffErs fRoM aNotHer.